Douglas: Welcome to the Unleash Your Potential Blog; what question can I answer today?
EmpowerMentor: How can I develop better communication skills?
Douglas: When it comes to developing better communication skills, the journey often goes deeper than just learning new techniques or practicing a more confident voice. At its core, how we communicate usually reflects who we are. Understanding how our identity shapes our communication style—and recognizing the unique elements we bring to each conversation—can be a powerful step toward enhancing our ability to connect with others.
Let’s explore how to develop better communication skills through the lens of identity and consider three practical tips that can help you improve. Along the way, we’ll examine how a supportive environment, like Toastmasters, can be a game-changer in this journey.
Communication and Identity: A Deeper Connection
Think about it: Your personality, values, and experiences shape your interactions with the world. Some of us are naturally more introverted, while others thrive in social situations. Some of us may communicate assertively, while others prefer a more diplomatic, collaborative approach.
But here’s the key: Everyone can become a better communicator by acknowledging their identity regardless of where you start. Ask yourself:
How do I express myself when I feel confident and authentic?
What values do I want to convey in my communication?
How do my cultural background and experiences shape my communication style?
When we align our communication with our true selves, our words carry more weight and sincerity. We become more intentional about what we say and how we say it. And that’s where the journey toward better communication begins.
Now, let’s dive into three actionable tips to help you develop communication skills grounded in who you are.
Know Your Authentic Voice
The first step in becoming a better communicator is understanding your authentic voice. This isn’t just about what you say but how you say it. Your authentic voice reflects your values, beliefs, and how you naturally express yourself when aligned with your true identity.
To discover your authentic voice, take time to reflect on the following:
When do you feel most confident speaking? Who are you speaking to, and what’s the subject?
What type of language, tone, and energy come naturally to you?
How do you feel when you are fully understood? What environment fosters that?
Once you identify your authentic voice, start practicing using it more often in daily conversations. This may mean cutting back on filler words, mirroring other people’s speech patterns, and focusing on what feels natural to you. When you communicate from a place of authenticity, you’re not just saying what you think people want to hear—you’re allowing them to see the real you. This builds trust and genuine connection, which are the foundations of effective communication.
Practice Active Listening to Build Empathy
It’s easy to focus on the speaking side of communication, but listening is just as important—if not more so. Great communicators don’t just express themselves well; they also create space for others to do the same. This is where active listening comes in.
Active listening goes beyond just hearing words. It involves paying close attention to the speaker, showing genuine interest, and responding thoughtfully. This skill can significantly enhance your communication because it demonstrates empathy, one of the most powerful tools for building solid relationships.
Here’s how to develop active listening:
Focus on the speaker without distractions (no phone, no multitasking).
Show interest through body language, like nodding and maintaining eye contact.
Reflect on what the other person is saying before responding. A helpful way to do this is by paraphrasing their main points to ensure you understand them.
By becoming a better listener, you’ll naturally improve your communication. When others feel heard, they are more likely to engage with you meaningfully.
Join a Community for Regular Practice
No matter how much you reflect on your communication style or practice independently, there’s no substitute for real-world experience. That’s why joining a supportive community—like Toastmasters International—can be so valuable in your communication journey.
Toastmasters is a global organization dedicated to helping people improve their public speaking and leadership skills in a safe and encouraging environment. Whether giving a speech or offering feedback to another member, every interaction is an opportunity to practice effective communication.
One of the most potent aspects of Toastmasters is the constructive feedback you receive from peers. This feedback helps you understand how others perceive your communication style and offers valuable insights into areas for improvement. It also provides a structure for practice, which is crucial when developing any skill.
In Toastmasters, you’ll observe how other members from different backgrounds and identities communicate. This diversity can inspire you to adapt new strategies while staying true to your voice. It’s a space to experiment, grow, and build confidence in your abilities over time.
Embrace the 7-Day Communication Identity Challenge
Now that we’ve explored the connection between identity and communication, I challenge you to embark on a 7-day journey to develop your communication skills, focusing on authenticity. Here’s how it works:
Day 1-2: Reflect on Your Authentic Voice – Journal about times when you felt most comfortable communicating. Write down key values and traits that emerged in these moments.
Day 3-4: Practice Active Listening – Choose two conversations where you will practice active listening. Afterward, note what you learned from the experience and how it impacted your interaction.
Day 5-6: Embrace Opportunities to Speak – Seek out two opportunities to speak, whether in a meeting, a social setting, or even a conversation with a friend. Focus on aligning your words with your authentic voice.
Day 7: Consider Joining a Community – Research local Toastmasters clubs or other communication-focused groups that interest you. Commit to attending at least one session to see how it aligns with your growth journey.
Communication is not just about saying the right words; it’s about making meaningful connections. As you engage in this challenge, remember that the ultimate goal is to develop a communication style that is true to who you are. Through self-reflection, practice, and a commitment to growth, you’ll find that your ability to communicate effectively will improve naturally over time.
Are you ready to take the first step?
I hope my answer sheds some light on your question. If you want to dig into this concept further, I encourage you to reach out and set up a conversation. In the meantime, check back tomorrow for the next question in the Unleash Your Potential Series!
Be Well!
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